March 1, 2004
Strip clubs make for interesting observation of sociological interaction. No,
seriously. There are so many warped instances of behavior inherent to the
atmosphere of a strip club that you could write a thesis on the subject. Now, on
the surface, a patron of such an establishment goes there with one thing on his
mind; "I want to see naked girls!" Clearly that's the primary draw of the place,
but delve deeper however, and you find there are many unconscious levels of
expectations.
Closest to the surface is analogous to simple, friendly customer service. Would
you hand over your cash to a stripper that was rude and obnoxious to you? Likely
not. Due to the intimacy of the environment, comparisons can be made on the
levels of friendliness by the girl at the strip club, versus say, the cashier at
the fast food restaurant. Sure, both will likely be polite (with exceptions here
and there), but the difference is in the extreme. You'll receive a simple "have
a nice day!" from the cashier, whereas the girl at the club will typically make
light physical contact with you, and maybe even sit and strike up pleasant
conversation with you for a few minutes. The difference is in their personal
investment in the service. A girl dancing nude for people she doesn't know
carries a lot more weight than serving a burger and collecting money.
Now of course, we already covered the basic principle of the strip club. Naked
girls. But when you go, that's not all you get, is it? I'm not talking about
drinks or shit like that. I'm talking about the ancillary services that are
actually a result of the aforementioned customer service. I'm talking about
attention. You visit a strip club, you instantly become the target of directed,
friendly, and eventually sexual attention. It doesn't even have to be sexual to
enjoy it. Take the aforementioned customer service example. This hot girl is
sitting next to you, talking to you! Holy shit, that never happens in real life,
does it? Of course not. Why? Because it's not genuine, is it? This is the only
service in any industry that I can think of where the product you're paying for
is actually inferior to the quality it would be if you were receiving it free.
Think about it. You're at a park somewhere, talking to a girl and she's being
friendly and maintaining conversation with you just for the sake of enjoying
your company. Now take the same scenario, but set it in a strip club and make
the girl one of the strippers. All of a sudden the motivations have changed.
It's not as nice, is it? Sure, she'll get naked for you, but it's because she
knows you're going to give her money as a result. That's why she's pretending to
be your best friend. You know that, she knows that, and that's what makes it
less of an experience.
Which leads to the reasons people go to strip clubs. We already outlined the "I
want to see naked girls!" rationale, but there's more to it, isn't there? Me, I
went because I was bored and it's been years and years since I had been to one,
so fuck it. Plus, I like the attention. Sure, I know it's fake, but hell, I'm
not getting the real shit so I'll shell out a couple bucks for the imitation
stuff. There are no doubt others like me. But what about the people who need it?
The people who have to go to these places because they've given up on getting
that stuff anywhere else. The ones who turn into "regulars." That's pretty
scary.
Check this stuff out next time you visit one of these places. Plus, now you have
an excuse to give your significant other (should you have one) when you go.
"It's for behavioral observation! Educational!" Hell, invite them along.
(11:50)
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Comment #1 by abubigbird
I found what I believe to be your first ever writing error on this site. "The people who have to go to these places because they've given on getting that stuff anywhere else." I spy, with my little eye, a dropped word! No longer do you remain atop my mountain of grand writers with the likes of Dr. Seuss and Hans Christian Anderson my dear friend.
(01-MAR-04 - 12:51 EST)
Comment #2 by karmaflux
HAH! Hans Christian Anderson DIDN'T EVEN WRITE THE CRAP IN ENGLISH! Therefore, Chris's VASTLY superior writings are VASTLY SUPERIOR.
And contrary to popular beliefs, many classicists believe that the surviving Seussian epics (probably the only Seussian epics) were in fact composed by several individuals; in the absence of any evidence to the contrary, most classicists accept the overall Greek idea of a single author. Whatever the compositional history of the poems, they were set down into writing within a few decades of their composition; the growing urbanization of Greek society led to the rediscovery of writing (learned from the Phoenicians this time), and the Seussian poems were committed to writing very quickly. However, they are an oral tradition.
(01-MAR-04 - 13:12 EST)
Comment #3 by Accipiter
Well, in any case the error is fixed. Heh.
(01-MAR-04 - 13:40 EST)
Comment #4 by dbrooks
"Sure, she'll get naked for you, but it's because she knows you're going to give her money as a result."
...isn't this the case with every woman? I mean, come on, you didn't buy her dinner for nothing.
(01-MAR-04 - 14:58 EST)
Comment #5 by Scribe
what about the hope that you will be that "lucky" guy who ends up with the stripper girlfriend? Sure you're paying for it now..but you're hoping it'll even out when one day she gives up the good on a regular, and far more intimate, basis for freeeeeee! I think that's one of the reasons people become regulars.
And no, not all women get naked for money/dinner. We instead get dinner without having to get naked thus making us all the more devious. See how that works?
(01-MAR-04 - 19:42 EST)
Comment #6 by Accipiter
The dancers in the club I visited last night weren't bad looking, but I'd much rather end up with the cute waitress as the girlfriend. Her body wasn't the same type as the girls on stage, and probably wouldn't be considered "good enough" by the management's standards to be a dancer (even though I disagree and wanted to tell her as such), but she was still extremely attractive and very nice.
Although the nice part could be, and is likely part of the "customer service" I discussed in the post.
(01-MAR-04 - 19:49 EST)
Comment #7 by Milkman
WOW - What a write-up, and so, so true. What strip club did you go to Chris??? The last time I went to a strip club was a couple of months ago for a bachelor party. Actually the women dancing on stage weren't really that good looking (in my opinion). I mainly watched the football game on TV. I only went up to the stage to give money one time, as the announcer came on and said that this girl was trying to become a Florida Gator Cheerleader. I HAD TO support that! :)
I still have my thoughts that the announcer only said that because I hadn't been up to the stage yet, and I had my Florida Gator shirt on. :)
All in all Chris, I love the postings that this has generated on your site, AND I am glad to see that the infallible CHRIS made a grammatical error!!!! muhahahaha
(02-MAR-04 - 07:16 EST)
Comment #8 by karmaflux
I had a friend who was a stripper. She was batshit. I met her co-workers once. They were all batshit. A little thought experiment discovers why: let's say you're willing to get naked and perform cooter tricks for cash. THAT IS BATSHIT. The batshitness carries over into the girl's life. You do NOT want a stripper for a girlfriend -- they are all psychotic. Well, more psychotic than your typical woman.
(02-MAR-04 - 10:23 EST)
Comment #9 by Accipiter
I went to a club called Boomers which is literally right up the street from my apartment. If you're standing at the exit of my complex, you can see the strip club. I hadn't been to any club of that sort in about four years or so, and like I said, I was bored.
Surprisingly enough, I was also bored while I was there, with the exception of contemplating my above analysis. I'm amused that I was more interested in observing the atmosphere rather than the dancers. I will admit a derailing of thought when I noticed there was a female patron who got up and sat down at the stage to check out the dancers. I kind of stopped thinking at that point to mutter "Woah. That's pretty cool" in a Butt-Head type manner.
Yeah yeah, I skipped a word. I'm sure Emerson didn't get it right the first time, either.
kfx: Batshit can have its benefits, too. You're pretty much guaranteed an unconventional relationship, which is pretty spiffy right there. Of course, you also have to realize she will likely continue with her employment, forcing you to deal with the fact that she's getting naked and dancing for hundreds of people a night. THAT is the batshit part.
(02-MAR-04 - 10:39 EST)
Comment #10 by dbrooks
Milkman:
I'd be more turned on by the Gator Cheerleader part than the Stripper part. But that's just me.
But aren't all relationships sort of like prostitution, just a much slower transaction? I mean come on. You take a woman out, several times, spend money on her, woo her, flash the bling-bling so to speak, and eventually, assumiung all goes right, you get a piece of action.
Not that I'm saying relationships are purely based on knocking boots -- but show me a woman who says that a guy can spend $0.00 on her in the first 3-9 dates and she wont mind, and I'll show you a liar. :)
(02-MAR-04 - 10:53 EST)
Comment #11 by karmaflux
HAH. MY wife HAD to pay for everything for our first months of relationship, because I was an unemployed short-order cook. So I know she ain't whorin it up.
But I dated many batshit girls. In fact, I think it's safe to say that every girlfriend I ever had was batshit, with my wife coming in as the sanest of the bunch.
Batshit isn't good.
(02-MAR-04 - 12:42 EST)
Comment #12 by Accipiter
db: I think it's safe to assume that because any activity costs money, you're pretty much guaranteed to spend money on dates. If you could manage to do stuff for free every single time while still being fun and immersive, I don't think the genuine ones will care that it didn't cost anything. That just doesn't happen these days, though.
Also, dangerous batshit or nutty bad batshit is probably not good, but I think general fun batshit would be.
(03-MAR-04 - 13:32 EST)
Comment #13 by ches
HAH KFX IS A NEWLYWEDDED FOOL!
(His wife is the batshittest of the batshits, but he succumbed to her HIP-MO-TIZZIM.)
(10-MAR-04 - 14:04 EST)
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